You are mine

I am not going to lie, this last week and half or so leading up to today hasn't been pretty for me.  Father's Day memories are filled with many handmade cards, ugly pottery pieces (that he treasured), ties, shirts, books, and more ties...

I have asked God more than once why he gave me such an incredible Dad.  I have had friends say, "Your Dad is the best, I wish I had your Dad."  And I am not going to lie, he was pretty great.  Granted, Dad and I had our fair share of ups and downs -- there were probably a few traumatic moments while he was trying to help me with my homework growing up... But honestly I think anyone trying to help me figure out word problems in sixth grade would probably want to bop me over the head after about an hour!  Seriously, word problems are so unnecessary!!!

To me, Dad was my "Jesus."  In every way to me Dad was like the living version of Jesus... with his intelligence, conviction, peaceful manner, unconditional love, and even beard! I remember when I was little seeing a picture in our dining room and I seriously thought it was a picture of Jesus, but it was my Dad in his younger years!

Dad was my "go to guy."  I feel really lost without him as I know my siblings and my Mom do.

I envision the Lord saying in the midst of these "lost" moments something to the effect of, 

"Peace child, You are Mine."

I have been thinking a lot about this phrase, "You are Mine."  When Dad died I was the first there and to many they say, "I am sorry it had to be you."  I know this might sound strange but I am so glad it was me.  Being the oldest of my siblings I feel like it is my role to be the one to protect them and to bear the brunt on some of the pain for their sake.  When I found Dad on the floor I ran to him and I don't know why I did what I did next but I immediately lied right on top of him and just started saying, "No, Dad, You are Mine, You are MY DAD!" over and over again... I have never, ever said those words before to him. It felt like I was lying there for an hour but it was more like 30 seconds. 

Why did I say, "You are Mine?" over and over again.  I am still meditating on it... I searched online for Bible passages that included the words, "you are mine."  If Dad was here then I could just go straight to him and he would be able to tell me immediately from memory where I could find all the passages -- so smart! But google will have to do in lieu of Dad.  And what do you know, it all started to make sense once I started reading Isaiah. 

Isaiah Chapter 43. How amazing you are Oh Lord! Below are verses 1 -7: 

But now thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob, and formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name: you are mine. 

When you pass through the water, I will be with you; in the rivers you shall not drown. When you walk through fire, you shall not be burned; the flames shall not consume you. For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your savior. 

I give Egypt as your ransom, Ethiopia and Seba in return for you. 

Because you are precious in my eyes and glorious, and because I love you, I give men in return for you and peoples in exchange for your life. 

Fear not, for I am with you; from the east I will bring back your descendants, from the west I will gather you. 

I will say to the north: Give them up! and to the south: Hold not back! Bring back my sons from afar, and my daughters from the ends of the earth: 

Everyone who is named as mine, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made. 

Today, I hold on to all the joyful memories.  I think of Dad today rejoicing with his father, with my Godfather and all the other father's who have gone before us that are now delighting in their children, grandchildren, Godchildren, etc... not from afar but with us always in our hearts. 

I leave you with something I found that Dad wrote about God the Father:

"It is Jesus who loves His Father even more than life itself.  For the sake of the Father’s plan the Eternal Word emptied Himself and became a human, humbled Himself and accepted crucifixion.  Jesus does all for the glory of the Father, to make the Father known, to establish the Kingdom of the Father, to bring us into a relationship with the Father.    Jesus chooses to reveal to us the fullness of the Father that He might draw us into intimacy with the Father.  If we can reflect very carefully on what Jesus says about His Father and what Jesus does in the name of His Father maybe we can come to love the Father more - more than anything."  

Happy Father's Day Daddy! I love you! 

Holy Spirit, Holy Spirit, Come with your Fire

On Sunday we celebrated Pentecost... the coming of the Holy Spirit over the apostles along with 3,000 disciples. 

This day was always and I am sure still is a day of rejoicing for Dad. If you knew Dad then you saw clearly the fire of the Holy Spirit within him, burning brightly with his smile, peaceful nature, and prayerful wisdom.

The Holy Spirit manifested itself in my life early on too -- before birth to be exact, as Mom tells the story that while praying with someone she felt something "leap" in her womb even before she knew she was pregnant with me.  My childhood was filled with prayer meetings, Charismatic Renewal conferences, laying of hands, praying in tongues and lots of rejoicing in the Lord.  To me, this was "normal."   So, when asked as a floundering college student if I wanted to go to a Life in the Spirit Seminar I said, "sure, why not?"  Little did I know how much that experience would draw me back to a childhood love of the Lord that I had misplaced somewhere along the way.  My heart was opened more fully to the gifts already given to me through my Baptism and Confirmation... More on this in another blog post. 

I don't know about you but for me saying the Novena was really difficult. I glanced at for about two seconds and put it down and I confess didn't say the daily prayers at all.  It wasn't that I was trying to revolt against the Holy Spirit or my faith but realized I am carrying around quite a bit of anger (which everyone says is normal).
Through the ebb and flow of my day my anger rises and falls.  I believe through Dad's death my faith has only gotten stronger.  I don't hate the Lord or want to scream at Him -- instead I am given comfort by Him and his unwavering love for my family.  But I am really just angry with Dad. When this anger rises up inside of me I immediately think of how much this anger must pain Dad and I say, "It is okay, Dad, I know, I understand, It is okay." I am constantly saying, "it is okay" throughout the day partly because Dad suffered enough already that I don't want him to feel any more pain (even though if he is in Heaven the Lord promises you will feel no more pain or suffering).  But I still wonder... even in Heaven can you feel sadness over choices you made? Can you have remorse or sorrow?  I wonder...

I leave you with this list... a list of titles of the Holy Spirit I found on Dad's hard drive that he typed out.  When I close my eyes I can see Dad saying these words out-loud rejoicing:

You are the Dove, Spirit of Adoption, Wind, Consoler, Convicter, Fire, First Installment, Purifier, Refiner, Seal, Living Water, Illuminator, Indwelling Presence of God, Spirit of Truth, Spirit who raised us Jesus from the dead, Transformer, Master of Prayer, Advocate, Endower of Charisms, Cloud, Promise of the Father, Power from on High, Unifier, Guide, Our Intercessor, Spirit of the LIving God, Spirit of Fear of the Lord/Wonder and Awe, Spirit of Piety, Spirit of Wisdom, Spirit of Knowledge, Spirit of Understanding, Spirit of Counsel/Right Judgment, Spirit of Fortitude/Courage, Reminder, Spirit of Glory, Tutor, Spirit of Hope

Dad’s Novena to the Holy Spirit

Preparing for Pentecost

A Novena to the Holy Spirit

Introduction

Following the Ascension of Our Lord, tradition says that the disciples gathered in the upper room together with Our Blessed Mother for the first novena, nine days of prayer in anticipation of the outpouring of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit was given to the disciples to empower them to ``be my witnesses... even to the ends of the earth.'' (Acts 1:8)

Today, as disciples of Jesus, we too join together in prayer for a fresh outpouring of the Holy Spirit in our Dioceses, our parishes, our faith communities, our families, and in ourselves. We need of the power of the Holy Spirit to be effective witnesses of the love of God for our world.

This novena to the Holy Spirit has been designed for either individual or communal prayer. The time commitment is not long, probably less than 15 minutes each day. The spiritual impact of serious prayer and reflection, however, is immeasurable.

When prayed in a communal setting, the reflection time after the reading of the scripture may be in silence or someone may be designated to share a brief reflection. When two or more are praying the closing prayer, The Prayer for a New Millennium, the ``chorus'' (in bold) can be said in unison, while the verses are said by a designated reader.

Suggested Opening Songs

Come Holy Spirit, Spirit of the Living God, Veni Sancte Spiritus, Envia Tu Espiritu, or any similar song invoking the Holy Spirit.

Closing Prayer:

We recommend the Prayer for the New Millennium (see below):

First Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Father, you have given us eternal life through Jesus Christ Your Son whom You raised from the dead and now sits at Your right hand. When Jesus, who is our life, comes, then we shall reign with Him in glory. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

Ezekiel 36:26-28

``I will give you a new heart and place a new spirit within you, taking from your bodies your stony hearts and giving you natural hearts. I will put my spirit within you and make you live by my statutes, careful to observe my decrees. You shall live in the land I gave your fathers, you shall be my people, and I will be your God.''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

O God, cleanse me of all my impurities. Open my heart that I may feel your Spirit within me. Guide me in your ways.

Closing Prayer

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Second Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Father, at Your Son's ascension into heaven He promised to send the Holy Spirit on the apostles and all Christian believers. You filled them with love, grace, and heavenly wisdom: fill us also with the gift of your Spirit. We ask this in the name of Jesus the Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

Joel 2:28

``I will pour out my spirit upon all mankind. Your sons and daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions. Even upon the servants and the handmaids, in those days, I will pour out my spirit.''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Pour out your Spirit upon me, O God, as you promised of old. May my eyes see the mighty works you work upon the earth.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

 

Third Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Father, Your Son has saved us through His death on the cross and by His rising from the dead. May His presence in us lead us to Your truth and the unfolding of the beauty of Your love. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

John 14:23-26

``Jesus said, `Anyone who loves me will be true to my word, and my Father will love him, we will come to him and make our dwelling place with him. He who does not love me does not keep my words. Yet the word you hear is not mine, it comes from the Father who sent me. This much have I told you while I was still with you: the Paraclete, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in my name, will instruct you in everything and remind you of all that I told you.'''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Enlighten me through your Spirit, O God, and teach me your truths, that I may live and move in your peace, free from all fear and distress.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fourth Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Lord, send the power of Your Holy Spirit upon us, that we may remain faithful and do Your will in our daily lives. Grace us with the fullness of Your Spirit, that we might have life, and have it abundantly. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

John 3:3-8

``Jesus said to Nicodemus, `I solemnly assure you, no one can see the reign of God unless he is begotten from above.' `How can a man be born again once he is old?' retorted Nicodemus, `Can he return to his mother's womb and be born over again?' Jesus replied, `I solemnly assure you, no one can enter into God's kingdom without being begotten of water and Spirit. Flesh begets flesh, Spirit begets spirit. Do not be surprised that I tell you, you must be begotten from above. The wind blows where it will. You hear the sound it makes but you do not know where it comes from, or where it goes. So it is with everyone begotten of the Spirit.'''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

You came with signs and wonders through your Son, O God. Open my eyes to see your glory upon the earth and may I enter rejoicing into your presence.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

Fifth Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

God of power and mercy, send Your Holy Spirit to live in our hearts and make us temples of His glory. In our baptism we died in Christ, now allow us to live life anew in Him. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

Romans 8:11

``If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, then he who raised Christ from the dead will bring your mortal bodies to life also, through his Spirit dwelling in you.''

Response:

Bring my mortal body to life O God, by that same Spirit which raised Jesus from the dead, for I belong to you.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sixth Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

God of mercy, unite Your church in the Holy Spirit, that we may serve You with all our hearts and work together with unselfish love. Allow each of us to recognize the gifts You have given our fellow servants that we may glorify You. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

1 Corinthians 12:4-11

``There are different gifts but the same Spirit; there are different ministries but the same Lord; there are different works but the same God who accomplishes all of them in everyone. To each person the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one the Spirit gives wisdom in discourse, to another the power to express knowledge. Through the Spirit one receives faith; by the same Spirit another is given the gift of healing, and still another miraculous powers. Prophecy is given to one; to another the power to distinguish one spirit from another. One receives the gift of tongues, another that of interpreting tongues. But it is one and the same Spirit who produces these gifts, distributing them to each as he wills.''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Accomplish your work in me, O God, that the many gifts you have given me through your Holy Spirit may lift up your people and bring glory to you.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

Seventh Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Lord, renew us by the Sacraments we have received. Help us to know You; prepare us for the gifts of the Spirit; then complete that good work You have begun in us by filling us with Your Holy Spirit. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

John 14:15-17

``Jesus said, `If you love me and obey the commands I give you, I will ask the Father and he will give you another Paraclete-to be with you always: The Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot accept, since it neither sees him nor recognizes him; but you can recognize him because he remains with you and will be with you.'''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Holy Spirit, remain with me always. Dwell within me and teach me to love God above all else and to delight in God's promises.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

 

Eighth Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Father, in glorifying Christ and sending us your Spirit, you open the way to eternal life. May our sharing in this gift increase our love and make our faith grow stronger. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

Acts 1:4-5,8

``On one occasion when Jesus met with the apostles, he told them not to leave Jerusalem: `Wait, rather, for the fulfillment of my Father's promise, of which you heard me speak. John baptized with water, but within a few days you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit... You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes down on you; then you are to be my witnesses in Jerusalem, throughout all Judea and Samaria, yes, even to the ends of the earth.'''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Fulfill your promises to me, O God. Renew your Holy Spirit within me that I may be a witness of your power to all the world.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

 

 

Ninth Day

Opening Song:

Opening Prayer:

Father of mercy, hear our prayers, that we may leave our former selves behind and serve You with holy and renewed hearts. Please open our hearts so that Your still small voice may have the force of a driving wind. Grant this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Scripture:

Acts2:1-4

``When the day of Pentecost came, it found them gathered in one place. Suddenly from up in the sky there came a noise like a strong, driving wind which was heard all through the house where they were seated. Tongues of fire appeared, which parted and came to rest on each of them. All were filled with the Holy Spirit. They began to express themselves in foreign tongues and make bold proclamation as the Spirit prompted them.''

(Silent or shared reflection.)

Response:

Fill me with your Holy Spirit, O God, that I may boldly speak to the entire world the many marvels you have accomplished in the midst of your people.

Closing Prayer:

Prayer for the New Millennium

 

 

Prayer for a New Millennium

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Come among us as wind and fire

And ignite our lives with renewed faith.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Help us grow in the life of grace

And reflect your presence in our lives.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Give us courage and faith to use our gifts

In the service of the church and your people

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Enable our parishes, our families, and our communities

To respond to the challenge of the Gospel.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Bless the young, support the old,

Sustain all those who minister to your people.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

Be the wind and fire that brings new life to your church

And open our minds and hearts to your -presence among us.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful.

May our prayer help us embrace the call you give us

To be holy people in the service of God and one another.

Come, Holy Spirit

Fill the hearts of your faithful. Amen.

 

Published by The Catholic Charismatic Center, PO Box 110578, Campbell, CA 95011
Permission granted for reproduction.
Original by David Thorp, the Liaison to the Charismatic Renewal, Diocese of Boston, Massachusetts